Hello all, I am the great, famous, and powerful Odysseus of Ithaca. Right now I am on Calypso’s island, giving a last shot at return to my home. I have found no way to get back from the nymph Calypso, but I now need to get back to my wife, Penelope, and my son, Telemachus. I need to find a way to get out of here. But since I have nothing to do all day besides sit around and listen to her whine about how much she loves me, I created this blog. This is not only to talk about my noble qualities, but to tell the story of how I got here. Maybe I will be able to reach out to my family. Here is the tale of my experiences:
It all started with the Trojan War. I left my home in Ithaca to fight there with my old friend and King of Mycenae, Agamemnon. We had success, as I’m sure many have heard the story of the Trojan Horse and my wonderful disguises (more about this coming up), but I was gone for 10 years. 10 years without going home, 10 years without seeing my family, and 10 years of endless fighting. We finally escape from war, traveling to several places planning on going back to our home. However, we had many problems on our journey. Our ship, composed of many trusted crew members, barely was able to survive even the first places we went to. Zeus’ storm sent upon us was one of our worst times by far. I questioned if we were going to get home. Now the chances have become even slimmer for me.
Anyways, I don’t know if you know my brother, Poseidon, but his son Polyphemus was also a part of our difficult journey. I kind of blinded him...and because he was a cyclops...and only had one eye...that was kind of a problem. He will do everything in his power to keep me from going back to my old life now. Things will never be the same, and unfortunately, like all people of my family, he is powerful. Not as powerful as I am, but he has complete power over the sea. This gives him all control over my life on the island.
After I blinded Polyphemus, he cast yet another storm against us, and this time, almost every one of my crew members died.This is when Calypso came into the story. The storm sent us to her island, and even not knowing her, she suddenly fell in love with me. I can’t blame her for this, who wouldn't love Odysseus? But I need to leave now. She has kept me here for several years and it is time for this to come to an end. I know that I will be able to do something about this though...someone will come for me. I mean, only if I am unable to get home, my family will come for me...they will...won’t they?
I hope that you all appreciate this blog, and if anyone knows anyone in my family, PLEASE contact them and lead them to me. If you are reading this Telemachus, know that I am still alive and I am coming home. If you are reading this Penelope, know that The Great Odysseus, your husband, will find a way. P.S. Occasionally, Calypso (aka the crazy nymph) will let me outside onto the shore. I will keep everyone updated and post many times, so don’t worry about me. I’m going to find a way to get back. Until next time,
ODYSSEUS.
Hey Odysseus, how is it in the rough, cold ocean so far away from home? We can tell you one thing; it’s not nearly as good as it is back here at your house. On the way home you should pick up some more wine and duck so we don’t run out because we are about to. If you want to keep your wife you had better hurry up because she is starting to seem more and more interested in the whole group of us. Also, if you talk to your son, please tell him to stay out of our way and quit whining like the annoying little pest he is.
ReplyDelete!!!!! I don't know whether to be offended or extremely ecstatic that this blog has reached you back in Ithaca! I guess I am feeling a good taste of both. Why are you in my house? What is going on? Penelope is mine so don't you even think, THINK, of stealing her away. Please contact her and tell her I have this blog. Run! Tell Telemachus as well! And I can tell YOU one thing: Once I come back to Ithaca you're going to wish you never stepped foot in that palace of mine. I wouldn't underestimate Penelope and sure wouldn't bet against Telemachus. Watch out.
ReplyDeleteP.S. Stay away from my wife.
P.P.S. Stay away from my son.
P.P.P.S. Don't call my son an annoying pest.
P.P.P.P.S GET OFF MY BLOG.